Down the Rabbit Hole

Miguel Calle J., Editor-in-Chief

“ ‘Would you tell me, please, which way I ought to go from here?’ ‘That depends a good deal on where you want to get to.’ ”

As the nation conjointly looks toward the reports coming in from CNN or MSNBC, the word war starts to be accompanied by a when instead of an if. The media outlets seize this absurd frenzy as an opportunity to expand on the ever-looming idea of a third world war, as if that conflict would be anything more than a MAD (both the acronym – Mutually Assured Destruction – and the term) annihilation of the earth and its peoples. Newspapers and TV anchors also use the missile that assassinated Qasem Soleimani as a chance to rip Trump apart, without realizing that, while they’re playing tic-tac-toe, the man’s playing chess like Bobby Fischer. There is nothing better than the impending threat of war to generate fear in voters and constituents, reminding them that it may not be the time for new leadership, even if the existing one has the melanin of a carrot and the diplomacy of Joe McCarthy. It is a politically sound move that could pave the way for a Republican win in November. Meanwhile, Democrats keep discussing whether Joe Biden’s too old for the presidency (most of the current candidates are too old to be anywhere but at home with their grandchildren, yet Joe seems to be the only one taking the heat), as Trump arranges the new arrows in his quiver gifted to him by the Democratic naivete. If FDR’s former party ever realizes that if things don’t change, it will lose (again), they will nominate Pete Buttigieg, because he is the sole candidate capable of beating Trump.

While acknowledging that many people will disagree with both the former and the following assertions, the explanation for why “the other candidates that matter,” namely – Warren, Biden, and Sanders – will never beat the incumbent president, and can’t hold a candle to Buttigieg, is quite simple. The frontrunner, Joe Biden, would be a fantastic choice to run the country if it were 1976 (even so, without Barack Obama, there’s no way he’d poll above 1%), yet the times have changed. At one point during this campaign, he referenced the need for kids to listen to record players at night. The context? He was proposing a way to end institutional segregation. That is only one within his plethora of gaffes now available to watch on YouTube. Additionally, Bernie Sanders, the revolutionary, scream-at-the-top-of-your-lungs democratic socialist, sincerely believes that the most radical leftist agenda in US election history will help him win. Sir, the word “socialist” already makes people want to projectile vomit – it is not, by any means, the way to victory. Alongside “the Bern” stands Elizabeth Warren, former Harvard professor and unyielding devotee of progressive liberal ideologies. If either Bernie or Warren had a lesser ego, they would step aside to let the other win, while joining the ticket as VP for the one that remains. Perhaps through an amalgamation of their strengths, the two renegade candidates, misanthropes of the establishment, could have a chance of winning. Yet that’s not happening anytime soon. 

As the three main candidates (all 70 or above) battle for the top spot, a 37-year-old former mayor of a mid-sized city waits for his turn. “Mayor Pete,” as he is affectionately called throughout America, is an academician and former Rhodes Scholar. With his youthful appeal and intellectual prowess, he has risen in the polls to fourth place, an extremely respectable position for a “newbie.” On his way to the top, he beat more seasoned opponents like Kamala Harris and Cory Booker. Buttigieg is also the first openly gay candidate to run a campaign this successful. In addition, his husband, Chasten, has the grace of a Jacqueline Onassis, just like Buttigieg shares Jack Kennedy’s charisma and boyish grin. Make no mistake, Buttigieg could be the most recent entry on the Democrat’s list of political phenoms, one that only had two members until now: the aforementioned JFK and Barack Obama. They too were considered inexperienced due to their youth but ended up in the Oval Office. History might repeat itself with “Mayor Pete.” As TCS student Daniel Zuloaga mentioned, “[Buttigieg] is a [great] candidate who could actually win because he’s relatable and can appeal to a lot of people.”

Moreover, as Buttigieg suddenly became a force to be reckoned with, periodicals like the New York Times and the Washington Post started to profile him and generate theories that attempted to explain why he was doing so well. The Times asserted that he “has proven to be one of the most formidable fund-raisers in the race,” and the Post that he, “seems to fit the ideal profile [to defeat Trump].” As a debater, Buttigieg is the only candidate capable of going head-to-head with the incumbent. Trump is a master of deceit, who can convince people of non-existing truths, and Pete is capable of calling him out through his coherent arguments and immense public speaking capabilities. He can also be alluring to the same middle-class white voters who elected the current President, yet he will have to fight for the black vote. In the pursuit of those black ballots, he will either win or lose the primary race. Let’s hope he can pull it off, or Trump can just begin drafting his second inaugural speech.